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Post by floyd on May 5, 2008 13:09:09 GMT
Post here any incidents that have made you laugh through peoples sheer idiocy. I will probably be on this one alot as our secretary is unbelievably thick and comes out with some corkers:
Her finest hour was during a discussion about 'nits' (headlice). According to her, if you catch the 'queen nit' your child will not get headlice.
She also thinks that if you get gastrointestinal worms, you like on your back with a saucer of milk by your anus so the worm will smell it and come out to drink. When they do, you must catch its head and wind it round a pencil to get it out.
I shit you not, these are things she has said, every day is a party of hilarity!
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Post by floyd on May 5, 2008 13:10:34 GMT
She also thought a guy who had a mental disorder that made him shout profanities had a disorder called 'tourists'
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Post by kajet on May 5, 2008 14:44:32 GMT
LOL!
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Post by elcamino on May 5, 2008 14:47:28 GMT
like the guy who thought gunpoint was a city or village somewhere.... a girlfriend of mine once had a big booboo like that. We were at a lake and she was swimming. An old guy on an inflatable matress approaches her and asks her if she wants to come along with him to bird island to find sweet water mussles. (Bird in dutch is vogel, vogelen means doing "the in and out", mussel= mossel and is also a word for vagina). She went along with him and was eventually shocked that there was no island and that the guy just wanted to see her boobs and stuff....This is a girl that has 2 university degrees in psychology...
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Post by pig on May 5, 2008 18:41:41 GMT
a girl i used to work with went driving fire engines, big diggers, trucks and buses in high heels. she she moved out from home the first time to a new job also didn't know how to cook sausages - so she boiled them........... she reads on paper like a genius. it just goes to show... heres some of her 'writing' www.shropshirestar.com/2008/04/27/the-station-grill-llansantffraid/
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Post by floyd on May 5, 2008 19:08:30 GMT
a girl i used to work with went driving fire engines, big diggers, trucks and buses in high heels. she she moved out from home the first time to a new job also didn't know how to cook sausages - so she boiled them........... she reads on paper like a genius. it just goes to show... heres some of her 'writing' www.shropshirestar.com/2008/04/27/the-station-grill-llansantffraid/ Amazing! The woman I work with on the other hand, writes like a dyslexic spider that has paddled through shit and performed a rendition of Ravells Bolero on the page
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Post by denbighdog on May 5, 2008 21:08:23 GMT
She also thought a guy who had a mental disorder that made him shout profanities had a disorder called 'tourists' I think she's got that right. The fucking "tourists" that come here make me swear at regular intervals.
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Post by mikeyuk on May 6, 2008 19:19:13 GMT
I think she's got that right. The fucking tourists that come here make me swear at regular intervals. Have you moved to Thailand?
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Post by pig on May 6, 2008 20:50:15 GMT
a women fell over as i drove very slowly past her and though the bananas she was carrying caught on my wing mirror and pulled her over... she was about 80 odd mind
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Post by elcamino on May 7, 2008 14:16:07 GMT
a women fell over as i drove very slowly past her and though the bananas she was carrying caught on my wing mirror and pulled her over... she was about 80 odd mind whut?
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Post by tedmaul on May 7, 2008 15:21:55 GMT
My Christian sister until recently thought that Christianity came before Paganism - and this is the woman whos doing medicine! Goes to show how even the most intelligent can be blinded by religious doctrine. However, all the people who turned on Brass Eye and/or the Day Today and thought they were watching a regular news programme have to take the biscuit, along with those who log onto www.uncyclopedia.org and are stupid enough to take the aforementioned's content seriously.
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Post by floyd on May 7, 2008 17:06:16 GMT
I work with someone who is muslim and a geneticist but doesn't believe in Evolution! Apparently, it was all put in place by Allah.........
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Post by xamishx on May 7, 2008 18:08:17 GMT
I work with someone who is muslim and a geneticist but doesn't believe in Evolution! Apparently, it was all put in place by Allah......... ................................................................... really. I got nothing for this one.
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Post by mikeyuk on May 7, 2008 18:33:37 GMT
My phone rang at work. "Hello, Mike speaking". "Is that HR?" "A bit of it, yes" "I had this number in my phone, and wanted to see who it was".
30 seconds later "Hello Mike speaking" "Me again. Just wanted to check I'd saved your number properly" "Well done, have a biscuit"
30 seconds later "Hello, Mike speaking" "Yeah, that's great, got it now"
30 seconds later "Hello, Mike speaking" "Oh sorry, me again. I got the wrong number". "Give me the biscuit back"
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Post by kajet on May 7, 2008 20:47:16 GMT
I know a guy who doesn't like pussy.
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